Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Stupid APS!

STUPID APS!

Yesterday when I got home I found a little note from APS saying pay your bill or we are shutting you off May 9th! What I say!? I pay my bills Mr. APS Man! So I go in log into my account and see that I have a $0 BALANCE - therefore bills paid. But I do notice in my short Victory dance that the account numbers do not match, so I call APS deciding its just some crazy mistake. APS asks for the account number on the notice and then my address and she says well miss the account number matches the address, but not your name. I say, yes this much I know... So she now questions me as to why I never had APS switched over into my name when I moved in and assumes I am living off someones account who has not turned it off. I tell her that I did and that I have lived here since September and have been paying the bills, so I am completely confused. I then remind her that my account number is different from the one I have on the notice, so she says, ok whats that number? Again I give her the number and she says well miss this account has been closed since January 2008. At this point I panic a bit thinking identity theft and then tell her thats not possible cause I swear I am sitting in my apartment right now and I never called to close it so??? I am baffled now and at a loss for words which is probably good for her. ;)

Then she puts me on hold for 27 minutes and comes back with this amazing news!

Apparently anyone can call APS and say they are moving into your place and by default close your account! Are you kidding me! I am feeling a bit punk'ed right about now, lol, and tell her that's ridiculous I should have to call and say I am moving or they should verify it with the complex - something! She assures me that this does happen and she is very sorry - well wow I feel great now, thanks! Good thing is I find it all funny, but insane - until she then informs me I will be getting a bill in 2 weeks that will be for the last 4 months! HAHAHA this invisible roommate of mine has been paying my APS, you would think I would notice, but I have been so busy and it gets debited out so I thought I was paying, lol. Tax check can come any day now..... really. So I kindly say, ok cool thank you and we depart.

Then my smarty pants mom says "well Rae if this girl has been paying your bill, hasn't she noticed she has been without power for 4 months?"

"Ah.... good point mom, good point...."

I hope there will be more to this cause it is moments like this that make me want to live on the beach where there is no APS :)

A Tale of 8 Ducks

I know this looks long, but it is worth it! No really.... Keep going, there's no monster at the end of this book.

A few weeks ago I was helping RJ and Danielle pack up my future condo and realized they live by a lake I have never seen! So we decided we must go tour the this lake and RJ felt it was a strong selling point I'm sure... We stroll down to the gate only to find it is locked and we don't have a key! Well lucky for us there are like 8 more gates around it so we make our way to the next hoping and praying it is open.... Sadly it was also locked, apparently Mr. Gate Keeper took the day or went off on a drunken stupor and left me gazing though the bars unable to reach the water ::hhmph::

But this tale really begins on our way to the second gate.... we passed a pool that was empty except for 1 momma duck and her 7 chicks swimming in the pool, the mom could jump out, but the chicks were too small to make it over the wall of the pool. So immediately I begin crying out "guys we need to save the duckies they can't get out of the pool!" (also, chlorine not so good for duck feathers). We make our way to the wall that surrounded the gate that surrounded the pool and you guessed it Rae jumped yet another wall! Only this time not so gracefully, I had flip flops on and well there was a lot of flopping.... Danielle and I make it to the pool gate while RJ is looking for another key and seriously the pool gate was LOCKED! The gate gods are against us today and yes Danielle and I jump the pool gate too. Finally we are in with the ducks and ready to get our duck saving skills on!

Apparently ducks don't like to be saved?! They kept swimming away from us and I tried to convince them we were there to help, but it just didn't get across.... So we start looking around the pool area for one of those scoopy things (ya you know) to grab them and of course they have just those giant metal hooks that you use to pull someone out of the deep end who has or is drowning (not useful in this situation). Then we see there is one of those life saver flotation devices so I grab it and tie by the pools edge with the plan being the little duckies could jump on it and hop out! It starts to work, but some fall through the hole and back in! RJ finds a nice piece of metal that we cover the hole with and end up making a bridge across, so it's working better now WOO-HOO! Then 3 little duckies can't get out so the mom comes back to check and the 4 that had previously jumped out decide to jump back in! Not a smart move guys! In all this one of the ones that got out decided to jump in the jacuzzi, lo, so we built him a step too. This goes on another 2-3 times and on the last try they all get out but one, well we Danielle or RJ had formed a plan to coral the ducks that got out and push them down to my future lake while I try to grab the last little guy who did not pass duckie preschool on how to follow the leader! Well this little duckie, let's call him Charlie, was freaked out now that his troop is gone and he can barely hear his mom calling for him :( Now mind you an HOUR has already passed saving the first group. Charlie keeps going to the edge with the life saver and trying to jump over the wall, but still cant figure out how to use our step so we begin to lose hope or we were just getting heat stroke, not really sure? Now I realize you may be thinking "just jump in the pool!" but we were convinced it would not have helped because these suckers are fast man - lay off! We begin trying to trap him in the pool gutter so we can scoop him up and out of the hole, but he is so tiny and small he keeps squeaking out and poor little Charlie is loosing his gusto (which surprisingly did not make it any easier to catch him!). By now it has been, lets say 2 hours and we ourselves are loosing gusto, so we resort to the metal hook made to scoop a person and not a duck. RJ tried using all his duck hunt skill to flip the poor duck out of the pool, well when my little Charlie did a triple lutz and hit the deck and fell back I decided to get down to extreme measures and go Bear Grylls on this operation (no I didnt drink my own pee or sleep in a dead camel! how would that help?!) I had 2 shirts on and took off the t-shirt to use as a net on the hook to save Charlie! This net saving operation went on for about another hour, no joke, and finally Danielle had him in the net and scooped out and when RJ tried to get him out and push him into my future lake stupid little Charlie jumped out the arm hole and jumped back into the flipping pool that is soon to become his final resting place!!! Danielle and I laid on the deck and just cried, I'm not gonna lie people... we wanted to give up and jumping in was looking good right about now. We decide on compassion and try to net Charlie one more time...... Minuets pass and eventually we get him and I scoop the t-shirt together so we he can't flee and we all waddle hook, t-shirt, and duck to the gates lake edge and finally 3 or so hours later release Charlie back to his momma and siblings and as Danielle, RJ, and I stood looking out over my future lake cheering on this happy reunion we realized we were now trapped in the pool and yet again had to jump a wall.....

Today's story is brought to you by the letter D and the number 8 :)